Researching and studying this subject how to be more confident
I’ve come across that highly Self Confident People have a lot of Interesting
things in common, which I’ll share below:
1. They Know They Need
Certainty and Uncertainty
It’s a fact that we as Humans need
certainty and uncertainty.
But we’re complex creatures and too much
certainty will bring us boredom,
too much uncertainty will make us anxious.
Doing the same things over and over,
having the same boring job we don’t like
will make us certain
that we’re bored and lazy.
When we’re bored, life is miserable.
Uncertainty is really what makes the world
interesting in its evolution.
The best innovations of the 21st Century
were created in uncertain times.
Sure, the unknown is often frightening,
but with uncertainty comes the wealth of possibilities
that are just around the corner.
Change is constant and so is uncertainty.
Self Confident people always seek clarity about the type
of the environment and people, they surround with.
This gives them a strong purpose, direction, and focus
in everything they do since they know precisely how
their actions are helping them reach their goals.
Conversely, when you lack clarity, you can end up
drifting in life, surrounded by negative emotions.
According to Brendon Burchard Book:
Clarity has 4 fields that you need to work on to improve:
- The Self & knowing exactly what kind of
a person you want to become.
How do you want to describe your ideal self?
- The social sphere and being aware and
intentional about your interactions with others.
How do you want to behave socially?
- The field of skills and knowing precisely
which talents need to be developed.
- Service to Others
what service do you want to provide?
How can you help others with your skills or knowledge?
Asking and answering those questions by myself
was really sharpening my focus & thinking on how to be more confident
and I highly recommend this book to everyone
who wants to move forward in their life.
3. Confident People Know
They’re Allowed to Put Themselves First
Putting yourself first is making sure you are physically,
emotionally and mentally in shape.
I suppose you’re well aware of the importance of filling
your own cup first or you will end up
with nothing to give to others.
Many will say you’re selfish when you honor yourself first.
There is nothing selfish in trying to be the best version
of yourself, to treat yourself with compassion
and kindness and feel awesome about it.
By honoring themselves first, Confident People gain:
- more energy,
- Better productivity,
- respect from others,
- less stress
4. They Know They’re More
Than Their Thoughts
“You are more than your thoughts,
your body, or your feelings.
You are a limitless potential who is here
to shake things up and create something new
that the universe has never seen.”
Dr. Richard Bartlett
This man said it all because if you let to
be controlled and moved in your life by
your 70k daily thoughts and emotions,
you’re going to lose yourself in no time.
Confident people know that they are not required
to obey their thoughts and feelings.
Eckhart Tolle in Power of Now Said:
People tend to dwell more on negative
things than on good things.
So the mind then becomes obsessed
with negative things, with judgments,
guilt and anxiety produced by thoughts
about the future and so on.
5. Their Opinion of Who They Are is
More Important Than Anyone else’s Opinion
This is fundamentally true because people,
even the ones closest to you will always have
some opinions about you,
even tho 70% of their opinions will not really
matter to you or will be fundamentally false.
It’s important to understand in order to be more confident that Everything
comes from your self-image.
Confident people have a realistic appreciation
of their own flaws, and they’re not afraid to show
vulnerabilities in intimate relationships.
When you meet such a person you are struck
by their quiet confidence and you notice
that this kind of people doesn’t seem to be
making much of an effort to impress you.
What’s important is how we work with what we are given.
6. They Take Responsibility
Taking responsibility is one of the best things
I’ve ever learned and done in my life lately.
This is liberating because you realize
that you can actually do something about it.
Empowerment Comes Via Responsibility
Many people live completely disempowered lives
because they haven’t taken full responsibility
for their lives.
Now, although bad things do happen in life,
we always have a choice as to how we act
and respond to our circumstances.
I was worrying a lot that I don’t have enough time
in the past 4 months to finish all my daily tasks,
but the reality was I was waking up at 13:00
and went to sleep at 04:00 for 15 months.
With that unbalanced time where all my body
and mind functions were dysfunctional no wonder,
I couldn’t achieve my desired results.
So, same as you I started researching more on how to be more confident.
Next, here comes November and I decided
to Take Responsibility, and since these Confident people
I was researching can get up at 5 am
I thought I can do the same.
The Energy, production, motivation-wise levels
I have for the day are mind-blowing.
(Jack Canfield course really widen my views, you can see here.)
Going back now changing one habit and
taking responsibility for me opened 10 new doors,
so think of something you struggle or
want to change and take responsibility today!
Since then, I’ve changed gradually many little anoying habits, but this was the main mover or
to better express myself… this created the “domino effect” for me.
7. They Are Honest With Themselves
Let’s face it, we all lie to ourselves.
Social desire to be liked doesn’t just influence
what we tell other people, but what we tell ourselves.
When you aren’t honest, you only choose to see
what you want to see,
but you ignore what you don’t want to see.
This may provide short-term happiness or relief,
but in the long run, it’s destructive and unhealthy.
Confident people are honest with themselves,
but not too judgmental or critical.
The goal isn’t to hurt your self-esteem,
but to take the information of the day
and use it to improve tomorrow.
Honesty is something we need to practice on a daily basis.
We don’t just become completely honest with ourselves overnight.
It takes constant self-awareness and consistency in order to become more confident in our abilities.
8. They’re Willing to Constantly Change
Now while some people have fear towards change,
Self Confident people embrace change.
It is change that allows new opportunities
to reveal themselves to us.
Change allows us to be creative
and evolve to be better humans.
That’s why it’s important to be proactive in initiating change.
There’s a classic quote from Jim Rohn:
“If you don’t like how things are, change it! You’re not a tree!
As you re-create yourself and embrace change,
expect and feel that the changes you want
to make will bring you a happier & successful life.
9. They Create & Live Their Purpose
Living your life as a drifter as the famous Napoleon Hill
calls people who don’t have a purpose or
one big central goal in their life can
be a difficult path to walk and live.
But Confident people have a purpose that guides
their life decisions influence their behavior,
shape their goals, their direction, and create a meaningful life.
How to be more confident if you don’t have a purpose (direction) in your life?
It does make sense… right?
How you can Create Your Purpose?
-Make a list of activities that make you happy
-Subject or field of expertise you can talk about for hours?
-What would you love doing for 2 years without getting paid any money?
-What will make you feel excited to get out of bed?
Every single one of us is Unique in some ways,
and I’m a strong believer in that!
The question that follows is:
Are you empowered to explore and model some of the
things mentioned above on how to be more confident?
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